It may not seem the kind of news we'd normally cover here at Flashlight, but we're all for equal opportunities, so here goes...Peter Andre has apparently written a new song attacking his estranged wife Katie Price. The song, which I am hoping is called Big titted fucktard git, reportedly (according to the bible that is The Mirror) includes the following lyrics:

"She said she was out with her friends/I saw her talking and holding his hand/I guess it's like a kick to the face/What did I ever do for you to treat me this way?"

Our thoughts:

1) Those words don't scan, even though they read like Peter thinks they do
2) How on earth is Jordan going to kick you in the face? As if she can get her legs up that high
3) I've actually just read that it's called 'Outta Control'. How disappointing.